When Did Meanness Become a Personality? (Asking for a Friend Who Still Believes in Kindness)

Let’s set the scene:

It’s a bright Tuesday morning. I’m sipping my coffee, scrolling through social media like any responsible adult procrastinating on chapter edits. And there it is. Not one, not two, but fifteen comments dragging someone’s handmade soap like it personally committed a felony.

“I’d never use this on my worst enemy.”
“Looks like slugs.”
“Bet it smells like despair.”

I mean… wow. That escalated faster than my heart rate when I remember I left the laundry in the washer three days ago.

And this isn’t about soap, or art, or books, or fashion, or whatever passion someone was brave enough to share with the world. This is about the sudden popularity of… let’s call it the Snark Olympics. And friend, everyone seems to think they’re going for gold.

When did meanness become the default?

When did “this isn’t for me” turn into “this person must be publicly humiliated and possibly banished to the nether realms”?

Now, I’m not saying we all need to sprinkle glitter and sing kumbaya under a full moon (although, full disclosure, I have done this—don’t knock it till you try it). But here’s a wild idea: what if we brought back basic human kindness? You know, like vintage charm, but for your soul.

Let me tell you a secret from the writing world: every author I know—myself included—hits “publish” with their heart in their throat. We want people to like our characters, get swept up in the story, maybe even tear up or laugh out loud. And we do want feedback, but maybe not in the form of “This author clearly writes with their feet.”

One reader's “meh” is another reader’s “this changed my life.” We don’t all have the same taste, thank goodness. I mean, someone out there genuinely enjoys candy corn, and they deserve happiness, too.

So the next time you see something that isn’t for you, maybe just… scroll on by. Or—dare I say—cheer them on for being brave enough to share their weird, wonderful, totally-not-your-thing creation.

Because somewhere out there is a person who stayed up all night writing, painting, baking, sewing, or recording a song with their dog howling in the background, and they finally worked up the courage to post it online.

Let’s be their “yay,” not their “yikes.”

And hey, if that fails, channel my Papillon dog Pixie. She has zero tolerance for drama, is 100% confident in her messy fur and sparkly collar, and absolutely will bite your ankles if you’re mean in the comments.

Kindness. It’s not vintage. It’s not old-fashioned. It’s just… classy.
Let’s bring it back, shall we?

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to compliment a stranger’s weird Etsy hat. Because someone needs to.

—
xo,
Sabine

Cozy Mystery Author | Papillon Dog Enthusiast | Believer in Good Vibes & Good Books

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