Skip to main content

A Day Without Internet (a.k.a. The Horror)

So, here I was on a regular old Tuesday, birds chirping, coffee brewing. I sat down at my desk, fingers poised dramatically over the keyboard, inspiration about to strike—when… nothing loaded. I refreshed. I stared. I unplugged the modem and plugged it back in like a techno-priest performing a sacred ritual. Crossed my fingers, did it again.... Still nothing.

The internet. Was. Out.

And yours truly? Flying into a full-blown tizzy. Not a mild inconvenience. Not a quiet sigh and a cup of tea. No, we’re talking dramatic gasping, pacing, muttering to myself like a Victorian heroine who’d just received tragic news via telegram.

Now, let me say this—writing, in its purest form, requires no internet. Not even a computer if you're hardcore enough. You can write with a pencil on a napkin while waiting for your latte. You can scribble in notebooks like it’s 1992 (Yes, I wrote entire books like this back then). But we don’t do that anymore, do we? No, because we writers have convenience. Cloud storage. Online dictionaries. Thesaurus tabs open like hopeful little windows of genius. Research rabbit holes. Character name generators. Pinterest mood boards. And, of course, the ever-therapeutic ability to email or message another writer friend: “MY MC IS MAKING REALLY BAD LIFE CHOICES, HELP.”

But without the internet?

Suddenly, all my documents were floating in the ether. My reference files? Vanished. My email drafts? Unreachable. I had the gall to try looking up whether a cinnamon bun existed in 1893 (don’t ask), and the little “no connection” dinosaur just stood there mocking me with his tiny pixelated arms.

I realized something unsettling: I didn’t know how to write without having the entire universe at my fingertips. It was like trying to cook a five-course meal with a single spoon and no idea what’s in the fridge.

And don’t even get me started on how I couldn’t vent about it. My email? Down. My group chat? Dark. I was trapped with my own thoughts. It was just me and my spiraling imagination, which—as a cozy mystery author—meant that by hour two, I was convinced the outage was part of a sinister plot, and possibly the dog was involved.

Eventually, I gave up. Curled up with a book, decided the day was wasted, and dove into my embarrassingly tall TBR stack like a defeated heroine. It was oddly peaceful—until I remembered I couldn’t post about it online.

Here’s the thing: the internet has only been around in its full glory for less than 30 years, and yet it has completely rewired our lives. For writers. For readers. For everyone who’s ever looked up “what poison kills instantly but smells like vanilla.” (For a book. Obviously.)

It made me think of a quote I saw once:
“You never really know someone until you've seen them try to function for three hours with slow internet.”
I would now like to amend that to: “You never really know yourself until you’ve tried to write a novel during a full internet outage with only a confused dog and cold coffee for company.”

So, dear reader, if you ever catch me gazing wistfully into the distance, it’s not because I’m dreaming up plot twists. It’s because I’m remembering the day the internet left me… and how I almost started writing on actual paper again.

Almost.

So how did I manage to survive the day? I finally decided 'research' was really called for, I went upstairs into the library, grabbed one of my favorite cozy mysteries and put up my feet. No excuse needed because - hey, the internet's out! 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Absolute Madness of Naming Characters

  Let’s talk about one of the most ridiculous struggles of writing a book. No, I’m not talking about the part where you stare at the blinking cursor like it personally insulted your ancestors. I’m talking about naming characters. It should be easy, right? Just slap a name on them and move on? Oh, my sweet summer child. If only. See, naming a character is like naming your kid—except worse, because nobody is going to complain if your kid and their cousin both end up being named Liam. But if your main villain is named Liam and you accidentally give the quirky coffee shop owner in book three the same name? Cue the existential crisis. Let’s walk through the madness. The Overthinking Spiral of Doom You start writing, and there’s that moment: your brand-new character walks onto the page, full of potential. All they need is a name. A simple name. Something strong, something fitting, something— Oh no. Nothing sounds right. This one is too complicated. That one is too simple. ...

DIY Audiobook. A bit of equipment, good advice and lots of patience

I want to create an Audiobook - should I?  Ever since the release of book one in the "Cannabis Preacher" series of thrillers, that question has been on my mind.  The "Cannabis Preacher" books were quite long. To produce an audiobook from each of the four, including voice actors and audio production with a turn key service, I was looking at around $15,000 per book. Financially, that was a non-starter for me at the time. That amount represented a LOT of books and audiobooks to sell to recover the investment, and I shelved my plan again.  With the popularity of the "Magical Papillon" cozy mystery series, I found myself coming back to the growing popularity of audiobooks. I knew that audiobooks could reach a wider audience and catered to busy readers who prefer listening while multitasking. The idea of bringing my characters to life through narration excited me, as it offered a new dimension to my storytelling.  The cozy mysteries were only 60-65,000...

Stories Are Everywhere: The Writer’s Endless Inspiration

As a writer, one of the most common questions I’m asked is, “How do you come up with your stories?” It’s a question that often makes me smile because the answer is as simple as it is profound: stories are everywhere. Inspiration doesn’t always strike in grand, dramatic moments. More often than not, it emerges quietly, weaving its way into the fabric of everyday life. Conversations with friends, the sights and sounds of a bustling city, or even the stillness of a room can spark the seed of an idea. Writers aren’t just storytellers; we’re observers, collecting fragments of life and spinning them into tales. Let me share a recent example of how a simple evening turned into the genesis of a new story idea. Over two perfectly crafted negronis, I was discussing the schedule for an upcoming event with a friend. Their house, a treasure trove of artwork, surrounded us. Every piece of art seemed to hum with a story of its own. Midway through the second drink, I remarked, “One day, someb...